The Art of Spiritual Practice

There is a time-honored question I often ask as a spiritual director, because my own spiritual director asked me this when I first began meeting with her.  It comes from the Jesuit tradition, and the question is this: “What is your deepest desire?” Seems like a simple question at first. But it always causes a person to pause when I ask it. It’s not something we take time to name. Sometimes a person might answer with the first thing that comes to mind-- like “I want to get this job I interviewed for” or “I want my kids to be happy.” And certainly these are deep and sincere desires. We all have this level of desire.

But then I say, “And what is the deeper desire—the desire under that?” This question usually gives a person more pause and uncertainty, but I might hear something like, “I just want to be more my authentic self, who God made me to be” or “I want to live with more courage and less fear.”

My Jesuit spiritual director followed up with this statement: “What you most deeply desire is also what God most deeply desires.” That understanding of God’s desire meeting my deepest and most important desire always touches me. To be met exactly there.

The rest of the answer that I was given by my spiritual director went on—"And when those two desires meet, the most number of people are helped in the best possible way.”

That surprised me. Usually we think our desires as selfish; they aren’t always, but they can be. Yet when we become aware of our deepest desire, there is no judgment; there is always love there—love of self and love of others from a Divine source.

There is not a one time answer to this question in our lives. It changes as we grow and mature in our faith walk.  For me, it is always a question that gives focus and clarity. And I always feel closer to grace.

Try asking yourself “What is my deepest desire?” or have someone ask you. Notice what comes up. Notice where you are met. Notice what you realize.

Pastor Marcia Wakeland is a retired ELCA pastor, a spiritual director and a listening advocate. She is interested in the actual experience of having faith and how that is lived out. She can be reached at mwakeland@gmail.com for comments or more questions Her ongoing blog of living out spiritual practices is listeninglife.live